I Wouldn't Know
by ThatGirlInBlack
Summary: A rumor spreads through the press that Draco is gay...Harry isn't the least bit happy. HP/DM slash. I know cliche...but thought I'd give it a wack.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I do not own any of these characters nor am I making any money off of this story.

**I Wouldn't Know **

Chapter One-

Draco Malfoy examined his finely manicured nails, pretending to remove dirt that simply wasn't there. He tilted his head to the right side biting his lips feigning pure unending interest in the state of his fingers.

He'd been doing this for ten minutes now. Waiting until he would be saved.

When would someone come to get her?

When would she leave?

No, not leave.

Die.

Pansy wrapped her arms around Draco's elbow, and he continued ignoring her.

"Oh Draco!" She cooed loudly, "Isn't it wonderful?" she examined the Great Hall suddenly her eyes stopping at the Gryffindor table then landing back at the hand Draco was so very interested in.

"Yes anything you say…" he drawled, picking under the nail of his middle finger.

"How does it feel to be engaged to the most beautiful girl in Slytherin?!" she shouted, making sure everyone within a five mile radius could hear.

Draco smirked. 'Why must you do this to yourself Parkinson?' He asked himself.

He turned to her and gave her his biggest smile. She was clearly unable to mask her excitement.

The entire Slytherin table was looking at them now and some students from other houses, some in states of pure unending awe. Many were surprised that they hadn't learned of the engagement. Blaise who scowled and shot the couple a dirty look, went on devouring his morning pumpkin juice, almost missed when Draco leaned in closer smirking even more at Pansy as she pouted her ugly lips preparing for a kiss and replied.

"I wouldn't know."

Blaise shot up from his seat and shouted, "Yes!" Pointing at Pansy's now horrified face.

For a second everyone looked up him astonished, and in his embarrassment, Blaise attempted to explain himself.

"You…you…you know…because," he paused," She…she…just got owned!" He smiled nodding his head wildly.

The entire table burst in to uncontrollable laughter as the stunned brunette threw a newly filled glass of pumpkin juice into Draco's face, gathered herself and stormed towards the entrance of the Great Hall.

Just then Ron nudged Harry in the side who was staring curiously at the Slytherin table.

"What do you suppose just happened over there?" he asked of his red-headed friend.

He shrugged, "Beads meh…jush shop staring you're freaking meh ouh," he answered his mouth full.

-tgib-

It goes without saying that Pansy did not sit next to her 'fiance' at last night's dinner, nor was she sitting at his side at this morning's breakfast. She, for some reason had chosen not to attend.

Instead Harry noticed Blaise was by his side, looking very smug if he did say so himself.

"Look the owls are here!" Harry heard Parvati shout, pointing up towards the ceiling.

Everyone at the table looked up to see at least one-hundred owls fly into the room dropping letters, packages, magazines and the morning's Daily Prophet.

"Good the latest gossip," Lavender Browne rubbed her hands together before tearing at her package.

She screamed.

Her scream was followed by many others and a loud shouting of, "What?!" from Draco Malfoy.

Hermione grabbed the news paper from Lavender who had suddenly fainted, and read the page her eyes bulging wide, and her mouth agape.

She handed the news paper over silently to Ron and Harry's side of the table looking petrified. The rest of the Great Hall was a blur of excitement and confusion.

Ginny was crying.

Harry's eyes scanned the page hurriedly but all he needed was the headline.

It read:

Draco Malfoy, A Queer? By Rita Skeeter.

Harry dropped the paper and looked across the hall at a rather angry Slytherin, who was now sitting alone, as everyone who had been next to him was smart enough to slide away. He was doing his best to continue eating his food as if what he had just read about himself meant nothing. However, no matter how hard he tried Harry could tell the blonde was embarrassed. The Great Hall was abuzz with whispers no doubt about the front page article as well as the tying together of a certain article with the fight with Pansy. Harry's eyes traveled to the Slytherin's pale jaw which was tighter than usual as he noticed a certain slimey haired professor walk towards Draco grab his shoulder then lead him from the Great Hall.

Harry Potter found himself wanting so much to follow.

Not because Draco meant anything to him, of course. He wasn't delighted in the least bit at the news. He still thought Draco was a dirty git…oh a dirty, dirty git.

Harry shook his head oh god what was he thinking.

Draco was a bad boy! ...A bad, bad…Oh god he was going mad.

-tgib-

"Did you read the whole thing?" Hermione asked pressing close to Harry in Herbology. "Apparently he's been giving it," she paused to giggle, "or getting it from Blaise Zabini…" she continued causing Harry to look up at the two Slytherins that were standing side by side.

He wasn't the least bit jealous of course. Not of Zabini. But once you go black, they say…

"'Mione, why do care so much?" He asked annoyed, "The article's probably lying. You know Rita Skeeter." He said thinking back to his fourth year and his encounter with the reporter.

"This information is too juicy to be faked," She licked her lips. "Bet Malfoy's father is having a fit, "she said lower.

"Look this is all a misunderstanding, and I'll prove it to you," Harry turned around hoping himself he wasn't right.

But why?

There was no way he had a thing for that…Slytherin, he thought to himself for lack of better…or atleast, less sexual term.

She broke off a piece of chocolate frog that she had snuck into class.

"How?" she asked disbelievingly, popping the bit of chocolate into her mouth.

"How?" Harry repeated nervously. "Ho…how? Right…"

Harry turned from her and walked to the group of Slytherins ahead of him. Hermione watched from the sidelines, but not too far away from Sprout should a fight break out.

He came too uncomfortably close to Draco for himself. Well they weren't touching, but Harry knew with just a slight step forward their lips could be touching. He imagined the press of soft flesh against his and the soft brush of blond eyelashes against his cheek. His eyes had glazed over now, and he had almost forgotten what he had walked up there to do.

"What do you want, Potter?" Draco demanded, the 'P' allowing a bit of spittle to hit Harry's face.

"I…I…want…" His eyes were so pretty, and his lips so pink and plump against his pale skin. He had the sleeves of his button down shirt pulled up to his elbow, like just about every other guy in this classroom, but oh there was something about the way Draco Malfoy did it. Anything he wore clinging with keen precision to his body…

"Out with it," he drawled on slowly.

"I…wanted to know…if what we…"

"If what you read in the paper was true, Potter?" he spat his name again. "Did it get you all excited?"

"N…no…I…just…"

"Oh dear me," Draco looked at Blaise amused, who laughed. "I do believe Harry Potter got all hot and bothered over our supposed affair."

"Now…look here Malfoy…I…"

"Oh wow Potter, I knew you were strange but I never took you for a," Draco leaned in closer then pushed Harry's left shoulder with the index finger of his right hand as he finished his sentence, "poof."

Harry lunged at him, his knuckles making contact with the fair skin of Draco Malfoy's nose crushing bone. The blond stepped back surprised placing his hands over his face which was oozing blood before throwing himself at Harry and making a sharp blow to his stomach knocking the air out of him. Draco shoved Harry down against the floor straddled him, his fists never losing contact with Harry's face for more than a second, pounding against the skin and bone of his face, slamming his skull against the floor. He was surely to have blood under is finger nails after this.

Harry saw only a red blur of what was occurring, thought to himself for a second, how sexy this could have been, had he not been getting his arse kicked.

'If only…' He thought.

But he wasn't. Not in the least bit…a poof. In fact the very word made him want to kill Malfoy. Especially when it hadn't even been _his_ name in the papers.

Finally the two boys were pulled apart with a flick of Professor Sprout's wand. What felt like forever to him must have taken only seconds to the rest of the class. Hermione ran to him protectively, her hand going straight for the bruise that was forming around his eye. Harry hissed at her touch, as he looked over at Malfoy for a sign his broken nose wasn't too bad, the blonde's face was covered in blood as Harry watched him push away Vincent Crabbe, then finally a stunned and shocked Pansy Parkinson.

"I do…believe…yes…" Sprout began surveying them both up and down. "Detention…both of you. But first to the hospital wing."

Harry's hands balled up into fist once more as Draco shot him a glare, still trying his hardest to look menacing while holding his nose in the sleeve of his shirt.

Harry looked at Hermione who stared at him defeated.

What had he gotten himself into?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters or this series...I am making no money off of this story.

I Wouldn't Know

Chapter 2-

"Honestly Harry fifty points?!" Hermione yelled as finally Harry found his way falling through the portrait hole of the Gryffindor common room. He had just come back from the hospital wing.

He looked up to find many angry eyes.

"How was that my fault?" He searched the room for any agreeing eyes and found none as his classmates began to walk away from him ignoring his beggings for forgiveness.

"You hit him!" Hermione yelled. "And broke his nose!"

"He…he called me a _poof_…" He yelled at first then his voice trailing off as he said the last word as to conceal it from everyone. He walked passed her throwing his robes off and unto a nearby chair. "Besides, you weren't upset until you heard about the points," he sat down. "It's so bloody unfair, they only lost 20…"

"You hit him first," Ron interjected, "Blimey I wish I'd been there to see it," he said looking starry eyed and sitting beside Harry. "Granted now the Patil sisters and Lavender Browne and Ginny all think you're a bastard."

"Bloody right we do!" they yelled in unison from the table on the left. "That's Draco Malfoy you hit!"

"How is that even possible, that they would all know what to say…" Harry rolled his eyes gaining a chuckle from Hermione.

"Maybe they rehearsed."

But they were right. He was a bastard…not literally…he was pretty sure his parents were married when his mother conceived. But that was beside the point. He had struck Draco Malfoy…Draco Malofy! In the face, his perfectly symmetrical soft, pale face.

And had broken his nose.

He should've been kissing Draco's face trailing small circles down his neck, catching a soft breath from the blonde as he bucked beneath him timid flesh brushing strong confident skin flushing pink with pureblood…

He snapped out of it. He shouldn't be doing either of those things. What he needed to figure out was how he was going to survive his 3 days detention, of which the first session was starting in twenty minutes.

Three nights of seeing nothing but Draco…sounded like a dream…he…had never had …of course.

-tgib-

Harry found himself in Professor McGonagall's office along with Hagrid, Professor Snape and a very annoyed looking Malfoy.

"I don't see why I should be subjected to this, it was Potter's," he spat his name again, "ignorance, that caused this whole bloody-"

"Now see here Mister Malfoy," She interrupted. "Did you not retaliate?"

Malfoy stood tellingly silent.

"Minerva…" Snape began, "Might I protest, that Draco has been through enough, in the past few days, and should be allowed to spend his detentions with…me?"

"I have strict orders from Headmaster Dumbledore to see to it that these boys serve their detention together, in the Forbidden Forest...alone."

Harry looked at Hagrid who smiled back lovingly. Draco's jaw dropped.

"In the Forbidden Forest!? Again!?" He asked outraged, "Has the old man gone mental?"

"Enough! Mister Malfoy!" Snapped McGonagall, "Though I agree that the punishment may seem a bit harsh. However, considering the severity of the incident…"

She shooed them away with her hands to follow Hagrid outside. "Off you go!"

"Ahright Harry, Malfoy," Hagrid commanded them to follow.

Snape pushed by them walking away angrily, his cape billowing behind him.

-tgib-

They walked out of the castle with Malfoy mumbling things along the line of:

"Don't know why I have to do this."

"Potter, stupid git of a homophobe."

"Wait till my father hears about this"

Harry just wanted to tell him to shut the fuck up.

They had reached the edge of the forest when Hagrid stopped them to tell them what they needed to do.

Apparently Professor Sprout needed seeds for a very special plant that only bloomed once a year at night, and that was the only time it opened up to allow its seeds to be taken and this was the night…

All Harry heard was 'blah, blah, blah'

Hagrid left them alone and Harry walked into the forest without second thought.

"You're actually going in there?" Malfoy asked.

Harry turned back annoyed, "No it's just an illusion." He waved his hands and wiggled his fingers mocking the blond, "I'm actually still right beside you."

"Piss off Potter…" Draco spat, "Well, have fun, I'm not going in there." He looked at his nails again. He was always doing that. Made Harry wonder what was so great about those nails, made him wish they were gliding down his back in sharp compliance with the motions of Harry's body…

"You can be so stubborn sometimes…" Harry whispered. Actually Draco was always stubborn, kind of like a child…only not a child…and more built.

"What was that?" Draco called from behind him.

"The next detention will be loads worse if you don't just get your arse in here!" Harry called back walking away, he threw one arm into the air.

Draco jogged toward Harry and was soon right beside him, "You'd like that wouldn't you Potter?" he asked breathlessly as if he hadn't just been running.

"Draco!" Harry slammed the side of his fist into a nearby tree. "What. Is . Your. Damage?!"

"Did you just call me Draco?" the blond asked stunned.

Harry walked away rolling his eyes, "That is completely beside the point!" He turned to face him, "You can be extremely infuriating."

"You sound like that mudblood when she's yelling at the Weasle…"

Harry stepped forward again.

They were so close their noses were nearly touching, "'Mione's right, you must be completely insecure, that you feel the need to call me a poof when you've got a million newspaper and magazine articles calling _you_ the pillow biter."

"Do you want to know what my…what did you call it…? Damage? Is, Potter?" He stepped forward and licked is lips violently, while Harry took a step back, "That I'm stuck here, with you of all people trying to find some bloody Night Blooming Cereus flower! And all because you can't mind you own bloody business!"

"It's kind of hard when information is plastered all over the press!" Harry paused eyeing Draco up and down, the night air had pushed his perfect blond hair out of place. He was breathing hard now, sweat glistening over his features, the first sign that he was human that Harry had ever encountered, but he was still just as elegant as ever. "And besides, who would you rather be here with? Huh? Zabini no doubt!" Harry replied just as immaturely.

Harry stopped to think, "How many times have you done it here?" He face twisted up in disgust. Oh the thought of Zabini placing his hands all over his Draco made him want to vomit…wait his Draco?

"Done wha-" Draco's eyes suddenly began to shine with understanding. "Are you jealous Potter?"

"What…no..o..ah…I just don't want to know where you've done it, is all."

"Are you really vapid enough to believe everything you read in the papers?" He said in his famous Slytherin drawl, "Bet you were even flattered when you read you were to be my latest conquest."

Harry's eyes opened with astonishment, curiosity and slight excitement.

"It said that?"

Draco was lying of course, but it was all he needed.

He stepped forward, Harry swallowed nervously stepping away, "Yes…" The blond whispered his soft lips brushing Harry's cheek just beside his ear. Harry tripped over a twig behind him causing a 'cracking' sound and fell embarrassingly on his arse, a slight tinge of pink sneaking its way onto the skin on his cheek.

Draco leaned over him smirking, he reached over to the right side of Harry's bum. Harry jumped to the side, ridiculously expecting well manicured, freshly cleaned hands to touch him. He opened his eyes when nothing happened to find the Slytherins face still close to his, terribly and teasingly close, his lips pleading to be devoured in a mess of sucking, licking, biting and the puckering of flesh. The colliding, thrusting and rubbing against friction lubricating warmth and sweat, ending in the pool of nothingness and lust that caused goose bumps and raised nipples.

Raised nipples and raised…

The kind of feeling Harry wanted to give him so bad and wanted to get in return…

Draco had something in his hand and he held it up proudly.

"I do believe I found…the flower," he said smartly.

-tgib-

A/N: Please review I'd like to know what you think :)


	3. Chapter 3

I Wouldn't Know

Chapter 3-

_There was an intruder in his bed. _

_The person seemed so strange yet so welcome, so intruder couldn't possibly be the best way to describe them, yet they were unknown to him, however how they got there he somehow found irrelevant. They were laying there nearly still, no hint of life but the small rising and falling in their chest with opening and closing of their diaphragm. _

_There was a brush of warm breath against his arm and the pat of small lips against his skin as the person seemed to whisper in their sleep. The person began to stir and he felt the pressure of warm lips against his bare skin, three pecks trailing down his arm that felt like fire against his soul. A hand traveled up his chest below the silky white bed sheet rising slowly to right above his heart. _

_The movement was teasingly slow._

_Suddenly he felt a wanting and a needing to be touched more and to feel the rough slide of bare skin against his own thrusting and grinding ever so slowly until he'd just about reached his peak. So that the soft breath he'd felt on his arm would be transformed into_

_Erratic, _

_Ragged,_

_Short gasps for precious air that would be filled with the warmth of lust and sex and then exhaled against his the sweat soaked, flushed warm skin of his shoulder._

_He wanted to feel this person's red hot stomach pressed against his gliding up and down as their lips locked in a needy kiss, his rushing heart beating intensely in his chest._

_So he would be the first to act._

_He pulled them up for a kiss._

_At first it was a soft brushing of lips against his, until the extreme need caused them to push against each other in heated intensity without retreat. _

_They pulled away and he was left needy again, winded, breathless and wanting for more._

_Suddenly the sheet was off._

_There was a sensation of vulnerability and a cold rush of air, much to the disdain of the young man, he squinted at the discomfort, but it was slowly subsided when he was pulled atop the person. The cold night air replaced with the hot slick skin of a hard cock dripping of pre-cum against his own, which had just now begun to twitch to life. He rubbed against the intruder eliciting breathy moans against his mouth as they ferociously devoured each other's lips. His long thick hard cock reacting as the slide of the erection against his was replaced with the warm dry calloused friction of a human hand, one that seemed, was used to gripping a wooden broom, much in contrary to what it was gripping now. However it didn't seem all that different now, the skin had grown taut around his swollen member, it was hard and throbbing with lust as the intruder began to stroke causing shivers of lust to escape his every exhale. _

_He felt a fire in his stomach as the hand gripped him tight gliding from base to tip_

_Again _

_And again_

_And as he thrust himself into the abusive friction of their hand he allowed throaty groans to escape into the air. _

_Begging…_

_For more…_

_He needed more._

_His cock was pounding against the palm of their hand, the pre-cum that escaped with every twitch and pulse, now lubricated the hand as the intruders fist stroked faster and gripped tighter sliding around his length and sending the pad of a thumb to twirl around his tip, making him shake and tremble with distorted broken breaths._

_Their tongue brushed softly against his lips sending a chill towards his cock causing him to buck inward._

_He cradled the intruders throbbing thick length in his hand to stroke and thrust in rhythm. The burning hot flesh of the person beneath him beginning to prickle in earnest goose bumps. The keen flush of skin warm with blood causing him to buck again, his balls growing tighter as they brought their strokes faster…faster…and harsher…_

_They intruders kisses were screaming harder…harder…more…faster…_

_And he was close_

_They were close_

_They thrust into each other's hands one more time before he felt his pulsing release toes curling, nails grinding down an unfamiliar arm._

_It is followed shortly after by the intruder's, the pairing of thick liquid falling over his hands and creating a crisscrossed pattern against the welcome guest's trembling legs._

_He lifted his head from the warm wet conclave between their neck and shoulder to look into their eyes._

_He was greeted by warm orgasmically beautiful emerald eyes, with warm golden speckles…_

_And a scar…_

He awoke alone in his bedroom, breathing hard and needing release.

-tgib-

It was finally the final day of the detentions and the Potions Professor's back room needed a strict attending to, no pun intended of course. It was a mess of parchment, spilled potion stains, unorganized ingredients and large dirty cauldrons, again no pun intended, and they had to do it all without magic.

'Merlin he's a tease,' Harry thought as he watched Draco saunter into Professor Slughorn's back room. It was the way he sauntered, that made Harry wonder where he'd learned to walk like that, was the Malfoy family self taught in the ways of sexy? But something about the way Draco was walking today was different. Ever since the Forbidden Forest it was like Draco was taunting him. He was doing things like brushing against him, staring at him with his hungry silver eyes, coming in close to ask questions taking off his robes to give Harry a good look at his arse, not to mention wearing tighter trousers.

Oh and it was such a nice arse.

But Draco had sworn to Harry in another heated argument that the rumors were a crock of bullshite, Pansy was angry that he called off the engagement and wanted revenge, and Blaise had been waiting for years to slip into her place, or more to have Draco slip into his place...but Draco Malfoy definitely was not gay.

It was just so hard to believe, what with the walking and all.

He wished he would never stop walking.

And never stop arguing, Harry loved it when he was angry. It was proper wank material…for the wanking…he was surely not doing…of course.

Draco Malfoy stopped walking.

Harry bumped into him. He'd been too distracted by the movements of the blonde's bum to notice that he had stopped, Harry's crotch collided with Draco's arse in an embarrassingly rough and abrupt way.

Draco turned and glared.

'Definitely not gay…' Harry thought to himself.

Then he smirked.

'On the other hand…'

"Should we get to work Potter?" he hissed.

-tgib-

Two hours had gone by since they'd first started working and Malfoy seemed to think it was okay to suddenly stop, sit upon a chair and watch Harry.

"I'm not here for your entertainment Malfoy," Harry said with scorn walking by with a pile of textbooks cradled in his arms.

"Oh but you're just so good at this cleaning thing…" he said condescendingly waving a hand in disgust.

"What's that supposed to mean," Potter spat dropping the books to the floor in a loud thud.

It was true however, he'd spent so many years cleaning for the Dursleys it was almost second nature for him to be a maid.

"Nothing," Draco stepped forward in his traditional swagger making Harry swallow and observe his…features, "I was just imagining you in a little French maid's attire, they use those instead of house elves you know…I've been begging my father to get one, it seems one might be good for relieving my… tension…"

'Definitely gay.'

Harry was left too aroused to speak.

Draco eased closer still, approaching Harry as if he were his prey. He didn't stop until the raven haired savior was locked between himself and a bookcase. He leaned one hand against the bookcase and leaned in searching Harry's eyes. Harry brows furrowed in confusion.

Then seemingly out of nowhere, Draco's cheek was against his, and his tongue was tracing the length of Harry's ear. The blond nipped at the lobe and journeyed downward biting and sucking Harry's neck before returning back to look in Harry's eyes.

He leaned in closer still searching for something, curiously still searching Harry's eyes.

In the confusion of the eye searching and the arousal at the random neck biting and sucking and kissing, Harry pushed his head forward, catching the blonde's mouth in an awkward brushing of lips. The other complied and swept Harry's mouth into a tussle of lips and tongue before pulling away in anger.

How dare he kiss him?

How dare Harry Potter have the nerve to initiate a snog with the Draco Malfoy?

Draco took three steps back eyeing Harry with disgust before spitting onto the floor in front of Harry's feet, wiping his lips and turning to leave.

Harry stared at the text books he had dropped in melodramatic misery.

Really, what had he gotten himself into?

-tgib-

A/N: Please don't be shy :) I wanna know what you think xD


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Happy Potter, or these characters, nor am I making any money off of this story.

I Wouldn't Know

Chapter 4-

He gripped his quill tightly, so tightly it nearly snapped.

_Dear Diary..._

_Dear Journal, no_

_How do you bloody start these things anyway?_

_Harry, __ew_

_Potter is a fucking_

_He's a bloody_

_Sodding_

_Fuck…_

He ripped the page out, crumpled it and threw it to the floor.

He pointed his wand at it lazily.

"Inscendio!"

It burst into flames.

-tgib-

Three weeks had flown by since the Potions room incident. Harry had been glum the whole time, gaining questions from Ron and Hermione, and even one concerned look from Draco, which quickly turned into a scowl. He was dying to speak to someone about this, he loved his friends to death but Ron would flip and Hermione would have a conniption. He wanted neither of his friends to have a fit.

So he kept it to himself.

Even when Pansy was all over Draco again.

Of course Draco didn't seem the least bit happy she'd left him alone for a gloriously beautiful week and a half before falling at her knees and begging for him back. He didn't take her back of course, but he humored her it seemed.

Anything to soothe the whiny little bitch.

But it still wasn't enough.

Halloween was two weeks away and Harry expected he'd be sitting in his dorm alone reading or doing homework he really didn't care too much for.

That was until he found out about Spirit of Samhain.

"What?" Harry asked his best friend, at the mention of the ancient Celtic holiday.

"The Ravenclaws…Its Lisa Turpin's birthday remember?"

"So?"

"She's having some kind of party thing because she's turning 17 on Halloween," he said smiling, "I want to go because I know Luna will be there, I've been wanting to stick it to her for years, and Cho will be there of course," he continued, "Turpin's her best mate. Maybe we'll both get laid tomorrow night."

"You want to shag Luna?" He said his face turning up in confusion. He had really believed Ron and Hermione would be an item.

"Hell yeah, thought everyone did. Anyone that crazy has got to be killer in the sack."

-tgib-

He was only going for the alcohol.

There would be no other reason for him to go to that Irish wrench's 'Spirit of Samhain' birthday party.

He suspected, he'd hate every one there and he was right.

Especially Harry Potter.

There he was looking all nervous, being smothered by that…Ravenclaw what was her name?

Cho Cha?

No…that couldn't be right…

He chuckled at the smug looking Weasley who was courting that weird blond with the magazine…

-tgib-

Harry had known it was a costume party, he took advantage of that and simply covered his scar with some magical cover up Hermione bought at Hogsmeade. Ron had dressed as the Warlock and his Hairy Heart holding a beating mound of fur in his hand. Hermione was a Mermaid, but the Muggle image of a Mermaid, she had charmed her hair to look like it was floating in the ocean. Draco was a Vampire.

Fitting…

When he had finally found his way into a corner far away from Cho Chang, and had the false security that he had finally escaped he plopped down into a chair. He regretted his decision when he found who he was sitting beside.

Parkinson.

A very drunk Pansy Parkinson.

A _very _drunk Pansy Parkinson.

An extremely positively smashed Pansy Parkinson.

"Oh Harry!" she screeched, putting her arm around his shoulders. He could smell the alcohol on her breath, he figured she'd mixed many drinks, he couldn't distinctly tell what it was. She had a horn in the center of her forehead…

"Oh goody," she cooed again "Someone who hates Draco almost as much as _I_ do." She placed her hand on her chest for emphasis.

Harry stared at her in disgust, but this could be interesting.

"In fact, I hate everyone here," She continued, "Except you of course," she added fakely, "Look," She waved her hand clumsily at the scene in the room.

"Look at what?"

"Just look, this party is terrible!" she nearly yelled. "I'm only here for the alcohol."

'Clearly'

"This room is chock full of the 6 types of people you never invite to a party!" She pulled the horn from her face.

Harry shook his head, "What Parkinson?"

"Exhibit A: The Slut." She pointed at Ginny, "She's wearing a red tube top that also reveals her mid-section and a blue mini-skirt, even though it's a costume party! If you're going to show arm and chest, cover mid and legs, or at least most of the leg."

"Exhibit B: The Control Freak." She didn't even need to say it or point, he looked directly at Hermione who was lifting a glass wiping the wooden desk it had been sitting upon and placing a coaster under the glass as she put it down. Harry found himself actually chuckling. "Besides what is she? Some kind of a human fish..."

Harry didn't bother to explain.

"Exhibit C: The Creepy Kid." She turned to Terry Boot, "Look at him sitting in a corner all…perverted and stuff," the pile of robe at his lap was moving suspiciously his hands hidden from view, Pansy shivered, "Ah…he gives me the willies."

"Exhibit D: The Weirdo." Harry looked over at Luna expecting completely to hear her name, "Neville, and Dean Thomas…they're just strange," she shook her head. "There's also the sub-category, of the guy who chooses to hang out with the weirdos, no offense Harry," she looked back and smiled.

"None taken." Harry leaned in closer and whispered, "You don't think Luna to be a bit weird?"

"Old Loony!" she shouted making Harry wince as Mandy Brocklehurst and Millicent Bulstrode looked at them and giggled. "She's her in her own category, she is! The woman is mad as a hatter! Or atleast that's what she likes to say. Some kind of muggle term…"

"I know…" Harry said looking at Sally Anne Perks as she walked by with a tray, Pansy grabbed a full shot glass off of it and downed it. He decided he'd take one too.

"That Millicent Bulstrode is almost as ugly as her name," she stopped and nodded her head, "No…she's uglier."

He really hoped she would get on with it, but she was the best entertainment he'd had all night and she was taking his mind off of Draco if only for a bit.

"Exhibit E: The Attention Whore:" she looked at Lisa Turpin who was surrounded by a large group of friends, she was a fairy today.

"It's her birthday…"

"I know! Her attention seeking is infuriating!" she yelled missing the point. Harry rolled his eyes.

"Oh and last but definitely not least…Exhibit F: Mister Melodramatic Tragedy," she leaned back on the couch and laid her head on Harry's shoulder, "That used to be you sweety, but in light of recent events…" she smirked, "Draco Malfoy, oh poor Queer Draco Malfoy!" she yelled in mock sympathy flailing her arms in the air keeping her head on Harry's shoulder, she looked sort of like a marionette puppet.

"Those articles were wrong," Harry defended him.

"Oh psshah," she slurred. "He can go around telling everyone how his last lay was that Weasle slut, he was always cheating on me you know," she added as a side note, "But that doesn't fix anything, even his own father doesn't believe him. He disowned him you know. Serves him right! Anyone who denies me has got to be gay!"

Harry swallowed trying desperately to contain himself as not to show his anger at her latest comment.

"Draco…and…Ginny?" He inquired slowly.

"Oh yeah, loads of times," she said before popping the olive from the martini glass she had just grabbed into her mouth, "And Theodore too, I think they double teamed her. Surprised it hasn't gotten around."

She turned to him and gave a goofy smile. Harry's fists were still balled as he attempted to keep himself from hitting someone. She was the closest to him and it clearly wasn't her fault so he wasn't going to punch her. Harry didn't know who to be mad at, Ginny or Draco or both.

"But that doesn't matter!" she walked her index and middle finger up Harry's leg laughing. "Draco's nothing! He's left with nothing and we have something in common…"

She leaned in and clumsily pressed her lips against his, he tensed up in disgust but didn't push her away. Draco deserved this, Harry hoped that he would see. He kissed back, the kiss was too wet for Harry's liking but he figured it was all the alcohol making her drool, she placed her hand upon his cheek and pulled away to smile at him drunkenly.

Draco better see this after what he did with Ginny.

He deserved every second.

He kissed her again.

She was right, they did have something in common.

They both hated Draco Malfoy.

-tgib-

A/N: I apologize intensely for that terrible bit of HarryXPansy het...made me want to vomit just typing it...i really hope that didnt cost me any readers...please let me know if it did...but its over now...and it wont happen again...I think...the next chappie will make you happy... I promise :)

I got the inspiration for the people you dont take to parties from a picture slide show on AOL living :)


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